Monthly Archives: January 2016

An essential habit?


An essential habit?

Unsuccessful people lead reactive lives according to other people agendas. They spend their time doing things in the moment and often only what is asked of them or expected of them. Look at their calendars (those that are organised enough) and you will see appointments and meetings with a smattering of events like birthdays, family gatherings and some to do tasks.

The diaries of most successful people tend to be much fuller as they recognise the power of good time management. However, even these people could catapult themselves into the top 1% of successful people and a whole new level of happiness by the use of one additional habit.

Although successful people understand setting goals and monitoring them through to completion is a large part of being successful this is not the essential habit I am proposing.

Just setting new goals as and when they arise is simply not sufficient to achieve all you want from life. Therefore, the habit I am proposing is to be very intentional about reviewing your goals and life regularly in light of current events. Just a few minutes of goal reviewing every month is simply not enough.

Strongly consider the benefits of setting aside a block of around two hours per week – every week to do nothing else but think about your own life and goals. This should be set as a reoccurring diary appointment with your-self and should not be subject to cancellation except in a real emergency.

This is not ticking off your to do list or keeping records of your goal progress. This is pure thinking time. Turn off your phone, away from your pc and emails. Go somewhere quite with your goals book (you do have one don’t you?)

Looking at all aspects of your life and check what is working and what is not.

What are your satisfaction and happiness levels in each area?

Checking if current goals are still applicable or should something else be given greater priority.

What is not getting done and what is the potential long term impact of that?

What is coming up in the next week or month and what preparation needs to be done to get the most out of that time?

What am I do to improve my important relationships?

What skills do I do to improve or acquire to help myself achieve my life purpose (hopefully you have already defined one)

This one essential habit done weekly will keep you strongly aligned with the why and how of all the goals in your life. This in turn will drive your motivation and success in completing your goals which has the power to transform your life.

Enjoy the journey

How do you deal with regrets?


How do you deal with regrets?

How we deal with regrets will determine our power and motivation. If we hang on to the old negative thinking it will diminish our energy.

However, it can be used to empower. Regret can instill a steely determination that will make us much more likely to achieve a better outcome than otherwise would have happened. So the trick is based on how to use regret.

I remember rock climbing and getting the jitters when, in order to get to the next part, I had to let go of the hand hold I firmly had. I was quite scared to be honest. It was an expanse that meant, I could not go forward without letting go of the old hold. There would be a gap in the middle of the exchange that left me with no hold. I had to determine what would happen if I did not get the new grip in time or securely enough. Hence being scared and the hesitation.

My new rationale was that I could neither go forward or back, unless I took the risk. I was too far in to the climb. So, having no choice helped me. I had to.

Taking this thought process to a different level, what would I have done had I had the chance to go back? This is the dilemma that faces us regularly. It is easy to not take the next step or to ‘chicken out’ with the view of keeping safe.

If regrets about yesterday’s decisions and actions help you do better work today, then they’ve served a useful purpose.

“I wish I’d taken that job.”

“I should have been more careful before I shipped that out the door.”

“I could have been more kind.”

“I’ll do better next time.”

Most of the time, though, we use regrets to keep us from moving forward. They paralyze us in the face of possibility. We don’t want to do something if it reminds us of that black hole we have in our past.

It’s useful if you can forgive yourself, because the regrets you’re carrying around are keeping you from holding onto the possibility that you can contribute even more tomorrow.

It is an old adage but each experience can be used for positive or negative use.  If that is a choice, why would you choose a negative. Regrets are a badge we wear and the choice of with pride or with fear is the focal point of our future actions.

I climbed that ridge. I made the choice, even though I did not have any real choice. It is when either choice presents itself, that we test our character. We can grow or shrink. We can react to fear or be brave and develop. It is a powerful thought process that allows you to adapt continually.

What a great choice.

Keep in mind that it is how we have spent our time learning almost all our life

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